Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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