I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
Randomize
