I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
