): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
Randomize
