when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
