i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
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