If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
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