There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
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