he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize