I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
Randomize