just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
