i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
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