Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Randomize
