So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
When did we convert life to cartoon?
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
