Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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