id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
bring money and cleavage
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Randomize
