Kiss
Puke
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
I met my future husband in an elevator. Think Hispanic version of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew from the Muppets, but with eyes like Michael Fassbender.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize
