Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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