This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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