Can Purell be used as lube?
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
