don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize