): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
Oh. Im drinking alone in a banana costume. Every time youre feeling down, i want you to think of me right now and know that your life is better than mine.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
