you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Randomize
