I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
