i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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