That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
