I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
Randomize
