i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
