Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Randomize
