if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
