YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
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