i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Randomize
