I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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