What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
Randomize
