On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Randomize
