yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
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