Rock
Scissors
Fuck
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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