Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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