I hate all girls vehemently.
Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
Randomize
