we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Randomize
