I wish I could teleport
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
Randomize
