AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
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