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Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
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