hotel room ftw
U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
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