I seem to have left my pride at pride
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
Randomize
