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Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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