just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
Randomize
