so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Randomize
