Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
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