Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
