The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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